On Wednesday 11 July 2007, hit_magain wrote:
> --- In mlmsurvivorsclub@
> > Another thought:
> >
> > Before calling the police and having them visit the home, check
>
> with CPS
>
> > (Child Protective Services) about what can be done in your state.
>
> The
>
> > sad truth is that there are many times the cops come in, check
>
> things
>
> > out, see no actual proof of abuse, the wife doesn't want to talk,
>
> and
>
> > all they can do is say, "Bad husband, no donut," and leave. Then
>
> guess
>
> > who gets blamed for the visit and beaten for it?
> >
> > ....
>
> There is still often the, "We're men and we
>
> > know how THEY are" attitude with some police departments. You
>
> want to
>
> > find out from CPS what you can do and also talk with CPS in your
> > daughter's area to find out how the local police handle such
> > situations. If they're "good ol' boys" then calling them will do
>
> no
>
> > good and may do harm.
>
> I would say that this has been the case historically but over the
> past several decades police response to domestic abuse has changed
> dramatically. If police find any indication of a physical assault
> such as cuts, scratches, bruises, etc. they will proceed to arrest
> and file charges against the offending party. The abused spouse has
> no control over this and for good reasons: the victim is reluctant
> to file assault charges fearing worse to come later and/or the
> victim dropping charges out of fear or hopes of reconciling.
That is in the case of an enlightened police department. I've heard
(and I admit this is 2nd hand) stories of people around here where the
police felt nothing could be done and left. There's also the issue of
proving it in court. Many times someone can be arrested, released on
bail, return to intimidate the witness because there's no restraining
order, and then return for the court hearing and get off because,
without medical records and testimony, it's a tough thing to prove.
> In this particular circumstance I get a mental picture of the
> husband shooting himself in the foot by irritating the Hell out of
> the police offering to show the plan to them.
That I'd love to see!
> No matter what state agencies and local law enforcement need to
> become involved before either the daughter or child is seriously
> injured.
Yes, they do, but it'll help to get the backing of CPS and other experts
so they know how to approach the police. If CPS says, "Call the
police, then come back to us," then call them, but first, check what's
going on. It's like getting the lay of the land before charging into
battle. Police departments can vary widely and it helps to know what
to expect from the local police and courts before acting.
Hal
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