MLM Survivors Club: Re: [MLM Survivors Club] Quixtar/Worldwide Group

On Tuesday 11 December 2007, jennasknnr wrote:
> I first contacted this group in August....20 yr. old son...2+ years
> involved in Quixtar.....hundreds of motivational cd's. I got great
> advice here and have continued to read posts. Well, my son moved out
> the weekend after Thanksgiving. Living in a situation that I
> wouldn't have chosen in a downtown area. I put up his first months
> rent and deposit. It was worth it to get him out of this house. He
> made us all miserable. Now I have to pray he doesn't spend every dime
> he has on energy drinks and vitamins and is able to pay his rent. I
> won't be paying it. I hope his independence will be important enough
> to him to save enough money to pay his bills. I think making him
> self supporting is the only way he will see the amount of money he
> has wasted on this business. But you know, even though that would be
> the rational conclusion that most intelligent people would come to, I
> don't trust his screwed up thinking. I guess it's one step at a time.
> Hmmmm...where have I heard that before?

I hate to say it, but at this point, one of the best things that can
happen to him is that he finds out just what happens when he doesn't
pay the rent on time (and I say that speaking, in part, as a former
landlord). He doesn't really see how the real world works at this
point and he's ready to believe whatever he's told by his upline.

This is like alcoholism or any other addiction. He won't stop until he
hits bottom. The quicker he hits bottom (and how far down bottom is
varies for a lot of people), the better off he'll be. If he comes home
one day to find an eviction notice on his door or to find he owes rent
and late fees and all his wonderful friends can't help him, he'll start
having to deal with reality.

Personally, I think, if that happens and he comes to you asking for
money, before he asks, you can fire a "preemtive strike" by asking him
the questions you know he's conditioned to answer in ways that indicate
he's doing well. Do you see what that does? First, before he can ask
for money, you've gotten him to admit he's doing well. You've asked
him questions that you know they've trained him to answer evasively or
dishonestly. He can't ask for money at that point without admitting
he's lying. It also possibly helps him by getting him to realize what
he's said is lies and that those lies have just come back and bit him
on his butt.

You have a point: this is something that could make him see what he's
wasting. Be ready to deal with what happens if he doesn't and he keeps
wasting his money on CDs and other tools. He could end up owing on all
the utility bills and even being evicted. If so, you have a choice of
paying the bills for him or letting him pay them himself. If you pay
the bills or help him, then he has learned he has a blank check and
should keep going until he's rich. If you sit back and use tough love,
he'll start to learn that the power company, the landlord, and everyone
else, doesn't care about money he's going to have, but what he has now.
A cold does of reality may be just what he needs.

I'm saying all this to remind you to brace yourself so if he doesn't
learn, drawing a tough line may be what it takes to wake him up.

Hal