Another thought:
Before calling the police and having them visit the home, check with CPS
(Child Protective Services) about what can be done in your state. The
sad truth is that there are many times the cops come in, check things
out, see no actual proof of abuse, the wife doesn't want to talk, and
all they can do is say, "Bad husband, no donut," and leave. Then guess
who gets blamed for the visit and beaten for it?
If I directly said to call them, I was speaking out of emotion,
something I go out of my way to NOT do on this board (okay, people, if
it weren't so serious, I would hope a few would get a laugh out of me
getting emotional here!). There is still often the, "We're men and we
know how THEY are" attitude with some police departments. You want to
find out from CPS what you can do and also talk with CPS in your
daughter's area to find out how the local police handle such
situations. If they're "good ol' boys" then calling them will do no
good and may do harm.
Find out what the situation is and what your rights are from CPS first.
Your local one might be good at helping you find counseling to learn
how to deal with this (and to give you support) and the one in your
daughter's area will know the oddities of the situation there. And
yes, I talked about you getting help and counseling. You are going
through one of the toughest situations a parent can go through. I can
think of only 2-3 that are worse, including sexual molestation and the
death of a child. I mention those to remind you that we know just how
serious this is. It is a severe strain on you and even if you've done
nothing wrong, you will be better off seeking a qualified professional
that can help you cope with all this.
Please, take care of yourself first. That's the only way you can be
sure you'll have the strength for your daughter when she needs it.
Hal
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