I'm out!
It feels so liberating to type that.
I got involved in the "orange fog" (aka Arbonne) 18 months ago. A
very trusted friend introduced me to the opportunity. At the time,
my husband and I were at a very rough place, financially. I had
been a stay-at-home mom for three years and had just had our second
child. I went to an opportunity meeting and heard one of the top
NVPs speak and I was in hook, line, and sinker. I actually promoted
to management level very quickly (went into qualification for Area
Manager my 1st month in the business). I was so excited, I truly
believed that I was helping other people be able to work from home
and have a potentially great income. As I ran out of my warm market
after several months, it became harder and harder to "sell the
dream". I started dreading sharing the opportunity with people,
scheduling parties and drop-offs, etc. I hated the feeling that
everyone was a prospect and if I wasn't sharing the Arbonne story
with someone everyday, and for sure everyone that I came into
contact with, then I wasn't a good person. The rhetoric and catch-
phrases started to sound so empty to me. "Don't quit until
payday", "Fake it 'til you make it.", "Is your fear bigger than your
why?". I slowly began to feel like if I wasn't rah-rah-rah about
Arbonne, pounding the pavement to sign up new people, launching new
business builders, etc, then I wasn't much of a person. I mean, how
could I put my own fear and doubts in front of the financial
security of my children? What kind of mother did that make me?
Looking back, I can see that I was desperate and depressed, two
emotions so totally foreign to my personality that I was drowning in
self-doubt and self-hatered.
And then it hit me . . . I don't have to do this. I don't have to
be gone from home for endless opportunity meetings and parties and
showcases. I don't have to travel all over the country for one
more "life-changing" training. I don't have to become that person
who everyone avoids because I'm always trying to promote my business
and my products. And so, I WALKED AWAY!!!! Wahoo!! No more Sunday
night conference calls. No more opening my calendar and feeling
guilty and ashamed and worthless that it's not filled with 6-10
presentations each and every month. No more wondering who I can ask
to host another party for me. No more, no more, no more.
I know what my life's purpose is. And it's not to drive a white
Mercedes paid for by Re9 sets. It's to be a happy and fulfilled
person, who feels value for who I am, not what my title or my
paycheck says. (BTW-I was an Area Manager, starting in June of '06
and made a whopping total of $72 for the year. That's subtracting
out all of my expenses-travel, and products ordered, and business
aides, and fees for craft fairs, etc., etc., etc.)
For so long I've felt like a failure because I couldn't motivate
myself to take this business to the top. The irony is that I've
never felt more successful than when I walked away from the Arbonne
fog and into the light.
"What's your why?" It's any number of things, none of which will
ever be fulfilled by handing out one more damn Re9 sample.
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