krissy,
Gawd what a truly awful experience.
Why did you not say what the MLM is? In one way of course, it does not matter because they are almost all very similar in the application of cultic techniques, on the other hand there is no need to hide who they are.
Unfortunately this is not something that is going to be easy or pleasant. Your friends' reaction to your rejection of the "opportunity" is a carefully laid in, programmed response. I am sure that you have not experienced any sort of spiteful behavior like this in the 11 years of your friendship - right? So it is something they have just recently learned.
The way it is taught and programmmed in is as follows:
1) Their upline or sponsor or whatever has sold THEM on the opportunity and has gotten them all fired up about it.
2) then it is explained that "not everyone is like YOU (your friends)"
3) "A lot of people just cannot see, that's why they sit in dead end jobs"
4) "Don't be surprised if people you thought you knew will not see it"
5) "only an idiot would turn it down"
6) "Good people support their friends"
7) "only a bad person would not support you in doing something that is such a great opportunity"
Your friends have bought into the mindset hook, line and sinker. Your turning it down was a real shock for them. It is also a dose of reality that they do not wish to face - if the warmest of their "warm" market is not interested it does not bode well for their future - which is scary.
You did the right thing - exactly the right thing. Your friendship has been torpedoed by this MLM and it is not your fault.
Mick
Krissy <surreal_44@yahoo.com> wrote: I'm so thrilled to have found this place. Back in June of this year,
my best friend's brother joined a new er...'team'. I asked him what he
was up to, but he was really evasive with his answers. He was even
leaving his wife, who had just given birth, to go on weekends. Since
the baby was born I think he's spent about three weekends home.
I was vaguely suspicious but I figured he was just excited about it.
My best friend wasn't sure what he was up to either, and we both
giggled over how much time he was investing in it. Two weeks ago her
brother managed to manipulate her into going to a meeting. The very
next day, she was trying to wheedle me into going.
She said the meeting was boring but the guys there were hot. Wouldn't
I like to come?
I of course, said "No". I didn't know what it was about and since she
said it was boring, I didn't want to go on a three hour trip to
someplace and sit through another meeting. Besides, to me it was odd
that she 'needed' to go to another meeting so soon, and that she'd
invite me to go. Wouldn't we be on totally different schedules?
Well, finally her brother asked me to go to a business dinner the
night before the next meeting. I reluctantly agreed. I've been friends
with them for eleven years, so I figured there would be no harm in
listening to what they had to say.
Dinner was fine and fun. He paid, and we finally got down to
'business'. He showed me his business card, which had no info on the
company, just a logo and name and how to reach HIM...not the company,
except for his own personal website, which he told me not to explore
until I go to the meeting.
That made me wary. He explained about what his company does, and what
this particular MLM did, how it worked, and how in just three to five
months, I could be earning thousands of dollars, and in three to five
years I could have some sort of residual income.
I knew right then that it was a scam. Or it feels like one, at least.
I agree to go to the meeting, but I tell him I want to research it.
Quick as you could say the company's name he had scooped up his
materials and put them away, stating that he researched it too and
thought it was all right.
I was told I would get all the information I needed at the meeeting,
that he understood how I felt -- he'd been skeptical too, until he
heard someone tell him.
Now I was annoyed and a bit worried. Both my best friend and her
brother seemed to totally be into something that neither of them could
-- or would -- explain to me. It was disconcerting and frankly,
frightening.
So the meeting ended, I went home and did my own research anyway. What
I found concerned me even more. In fact, it was rather alarming.
Neither of them would answer my calls that night, so I had to leave a
message that I was sorry, but I didn't want to attend their meeting
after all.
The next day I still hadn't heard from them, and I finally called. My
best friend of eleven years called me a horrendous name and demanded
to know why I didn't want to attend their meeting. I tried to be
polite by telling her I couldn't afford it, but apparently it's only
$25 bucks to join or some non-sense. She kept pressing me for an
answer, so finally I responded honestly; it was a scam, a pyramid, and
I wanted no part of this particular company.
That made her angry, she accused me of lying. She told me I had no
desire to improve my life, that I had no chance of being successful,
and she claimed I had insulted her family because they had researched.
Then she asked if I was really saying no, and I said, "That's right,
I'm not going."
Her brother calls me ten minutes later and said he didn't think I had
the ability or desire to do this anyway, but he and his sister had
wanted to provide me with a chance to be successful.
They haven't spoken to me since. I'm frustrated, angry, and terrified
for them. I also feel like my heart's been broken, since I've known
them for so long. They acted like I was dirt, like I was nothing --
and now they are pretending I don't exist.
So that's my story. Any help or suggestions on how to deal with this?
"Yo, Brutus, you just glad to see me or is that a knife under your cloak?"Julius Caesar
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