some things to ponder - well said. You are correct the first priority is the abuse, not Quixtar (good lord I never thought I would be saying that). I do hope the daughter is looking to use Quixtar to get out but my paltry experience of dealing with people in abusive relationships leads me to think not.
My closest friend's sister married an abuser. It took two years before my friend found out about it - and only then because he was tipped off by someone else. He and I went round their house, we helped pack her stuff, moved her and the child into an apartment close to our neighborhood and let the guy know that we would be doing some really serious stuff should he lay a hand on her.
It took 4 weeks, the bruises and cuts were barely healed and she moved back in with him. She refused to talk to my friend or me because we had "caused all these problems". 2 months later we were fetching her from the emergency room, where he had sent her.
We had to physically run the guy out of our town and convince him that if he ever came near her, he would would never do it again. Fortunately we come from a very interconnected neighborhood and he left and never came back. It took years to get her over it, every once in a while she would get a bee in her bonnet about trying to find him, we would endure a month or two of being told it was all our fault and then it would settle down again.
There was a flurry of advice about contacting CPS or other agencies in the State or City. I would definitely go for that if for no other reason than to establish a pattern of conduct, Domestic violence is becoming less and less hidden and acceptable, it may help hold this loser in line.
Mick
narcissedespres <Narcissedespres@
them? Thanks.>>
I would strongly advise against confronting, or even speaking with her
upline about *anything*. As Hal said, it wouldn't do any good and
would likely cause more harm. I know it is far easier said than done,
but I think that it might help for the abuse and Quixtar to be looked
at as two different issues. Both are of concern, but the abuse is the
far more pressing and dangerous of the two at this point in time.
From what you said, it seems as though her husband would be the same
abusive person regardless of Quixtar involvement, so Quixtar alone
cannot be held responsible for his abusive behavior.
Here are some thoughts regarding your daughter's Quixtar involvement.
If she is out "working the business", recruiting/selling/
plan, she may find some time away from her husband. Perhaps that is
another reason why she is working the business so hard. I would
imagine that the "you are a winner" message of Quixtar may also be
having an even stronger effect than usual, since those in abusive
relationships sometimes have low self-esteem (as a direct result of
the actions of the abusive partner). Quixtar may be giving your
daughter something positive (in her mind) to focus on. It might even
be possible that she sees the financial promises of Quixtar as an
eventual escape route.
These are all just guesses, of course, and they may all be totally
off-base. Please continue to keep us updated!
-EA
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